It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
