State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
