ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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