Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize