Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
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Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
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I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped