...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
I did not marry a roomba.
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