quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Randomize
