so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
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