just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Randomize
