im drinking this country out of the recession.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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