Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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