we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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