you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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