i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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