I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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