I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
