I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I enjoy the company of your penis
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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