id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
