Don't you send me to vm
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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