hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
