You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
