Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize