Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
