Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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