I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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