Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Randomize
