Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Randomize