man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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