I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
