When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Your cock deserves a montage
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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