Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
