I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
