She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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