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did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
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