what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
high people should be assigned attendants
We need to rekindle our bromance
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
