she looked like the before picture.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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