so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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