I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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