dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
