Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
