Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize