Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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