So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Randomize
