I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
