So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
