The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
