pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
