I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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