speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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