What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
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You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
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