Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
