I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
