We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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