So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
